BitcoinSOS Soul of Satoshi Client Releases as BTC/BCH Drama Debate Continues


BitcoinSOS (Soul of Satoshi) Client Announced

There’s huge news in the cryptocurrency community today as a new client called BitcoinSOS (Soul of Satoshi) was announced on Reddit’s /r/btc.

BitcoinSOS promises to be “the most Satoshi client out there” and claims that anyone who doesn’t support the project is a “socialist.”

Key features of BitcoinSOS include 128 petabyte blocks with “none of this socialist 128MB crap”. The development team has also announced plans to hire paid shills and build their own media company called CoinNerd.

Yes, BitcoinSOS is a complete joke. It’s a tongue-in-cheek look at the recent dispute in the Bitcoin Cash community.

For those out of the loop, the conflict in the BCH community centers on OP_Codes and bigger blocksizes. Some miners – including Calvin Ayre and Coingeek, the largest BCH miner – support raising the blocksize to 128MB as proposed by Craig Wright. Other miners – including Chinese mining giants – claim the blocksize is already high enough and claim bitcoin needs more functionality by re-adding OP_Codes.

The dispute is getting nasty, with both sides frequently trading jabs on Twitter over the past week.

BitcoinSOS Brings Some Much-Needed Levity To The Situation.

Craig Wright claims that raising the blocksize to 128MB will help prepare BCH for the future. BitcoinSOS, however, takes that a step further by raising the blocksize to 128 petabytes.

Anyone who doesn’t support 128 petabyte blocksize, according to the BitcoinSOS team, is a socialist who hates capitalism.

BitcoinSOS also emphasizes its connections to Satoshi Nakamoto. In fact, the development team has found a way to hardcode Satoshi’s soul into the client itself

“BitcoinSOS is the truest vision of Satoshi out there. We actually codified Satoshi's soul into this client. It is so Satoshi that you don't need to even listen to anyone else any more. Just listen to BitcoinSOS and don't think. We are going to lock the protocol down.”

Other key features of BitcoinSOS include:

  • The development team will build a media company called CoinNerd “to control the conversion both online and in-person at conferences”
  • Hire paid shills like Blockstream because “Blockstream’s tactics worked like a charm”
  • Build an echo chamber online where the community has a safe space to discuss the project: “We aren't lucky enough to control our own r/bitcoin so we'll need to build one”
  • Attempt to convince BCH developers to sign a contract “swearing allegiance to BitcoinSOS”
  • Hire a “Satoshi front man” who will study the subject matter closely “just enough to stand on a stage and sound like he knows what he is talking about”; this front man will be on display at every opportunity and “in almost every sentence he will allude to the fact he is Satoshi, but of course he won’t prove it”
  • Patent everything built on the blockchain
  • Spend money on a few key pieces of infrastructure in the BCH ecosystem “so that we look great to the community”
  • Call anyone who questions the BitcoinSOS project socialists and enemies of the people
  • Tell everyone that only miners matter
  • Only speak in three word sentences “for dummies to follow”

If the project starts to fail, then BitcoinSOS will take things to the next level:

“…we'll say that BitcoinSOS is the only client that represents Bitcoin and Satoshi's will. Anyone who does not agree with Satoshi Vision is welcome to fork off to their own new path. Any forks from the Satoshi Vision path will not be Bitcoin and will have to come up with some other name for their fork.”

Ultimately, the tongue-in-cheek post has attracted a bit of attention on /r/btc this morning. It’s clearly a criticism of Craig Wright and Calvin Ayre’s approach to BCH. You can view full details about BitcoinSOS “Soul of Satoshi”.

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